Shifting to a new site

Dear all,

I have shifted this blog to a new domain site of it's own at http://www.giftoflistening.com
The new site is still largely under construction (the pages under the navigation bar) though the blog entries will be updated regularly.

Pls do bookmark the new site instead.

Flower power heals the green-fingered

Another backdated article from a few months back.

Flower power heals the green-fingered

By Shelagh Mahbubani - Feb 15, 2007
The Straits Times

The healing power of plants is fast gaining recognition in Singapore.

While gardeners already know the calming influence of being in the yard, in the controlled environment of a hospital, it is called horticultural therapy. Studies worldwide have shown that gardening with a trained therapist can help patients learn new skills and regain those lost. Improved memory, initiation of tasks and attention to detail are recognised benefits, and patients also retrain muscles, improve coordination, balance and strength.

In the United States, for instance, horticultural therapy is already used in a wide range of rehabilitation services for cardiac patients, physical therapy and even for people serving prison terms.

And experts here also are giving it a thumbs up.

To read the full article, refer to the below link
http://health.asiaone.com.sg/mensmatter/20070216_003.html

Minorities prefer depression counseling to drugs

Fri May 18, 3:35 PM ET NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - When it comes to depression therapy, minorities are more likely than whites to prefer counseling to medication, according to a large U.S. survey

In an Internet survey of about 75,000 Americans, researchers found that African Americans, Hispanics and Asian Americans were two to three times more likely than whites to say they'd rather be treated with talk therapy than with drugs for depression.

Minorities were also less likely to believe that depression stems from biological changes in the brain and were more likely to think antidepressants are addictive, according to findings published in the journal General Hospital Psychiatry.

"This study documents that, overall, ethnic minorities hold attitudes toward depression and depression treatment that are distinct from those of white participants," lead study author Dr. Jane Givens, of Boston University Medical Center, said in a statement.

For the full article, refer to
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070518/hl_nm/minorities_depression_dc;_ylt=AhmQ_HnJahX8BUME13Ak0GXVJRIF

China ill equipped to treat mental health problems

China ill equipped to treat mental health problems

Sat May 19, 4:31 PM ET

SHANGHAI (AFP) - Most Chinese who suffer from depression do not get proper treatment due to a lack of psychiatrists and public prejudice, state press reported Friday, citing the country's mental health professionals.

China has just 17,000 registered psychiatrists for its 30 million depression patients, only one-10th of the ratio in Western countries, the China Daily newspaper reported, citing figures from an industry meeting here.

The imbalance means 90 percent of people in China with depression do not get adequate treatment, according to health experts at the meeting.

"There are just too few doctors available," Hao Wei, vice-director of the Chinese Psychiatrists Association, was quoted as saying.

Moreover, public prejudice against mental diseases also deterred sufferers from consulting psychiatrists, with women and people in rural areas the most affected.

Many patients were reluctant to look for professional care and visited physicians instead on fear of prejudice, Hao said.

Many patients were reluctant to look for professional care and visited physicians instead on fear of prejudice, Hao said.

The economic cost of depression to China, in medical bills and lost employment opportunities, is nearly eight billion dollars a year, according to experts at the conference

For the article, refer to the below link

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20070519/hl_afp/healthchinamental;_ylt=AnoJoKsan21SR5HIM1iyn_3VJRIF

Schools have measures to detect psychosis among students: Lui

Schools have measures to detect psychosis among students: Lui
By Pearl Forss, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 22 May 2007 1928 hrs

SINGAPORE: The recent massacre at the University of Virginia in the US prompted MPs to ask the Education Ministry about the measures in place to detect psychosis among students.

Minister of State for Education Lui Tuck Yew said there are three tiers of help.

The teachers will first identify problem behaviour.

The students are then referred to school counsellors.

Severe cases are referred to the Institute of Mental Health for expert help.

RADM (NS) Lui said: "In 2006, only 31 out of a total of 7,155 cases of schizophrenia - which is the most common form of psychosis - were diagnosed for patients aged under 18 years by the Child Guidance Clinic of the Institute of Mental Health.

"With regard to what happened in the University of Virginia, our institutions of higher learning actually have a system in place where there are people who are on the lookout for such developments."

He added that schools also have programmes to reintegrate students who have been treated for mental problems.

MP Halimah Yacob asked if schools have programmes to not only train counsellors and teachers but also raise awareness among students about the challenges and problems faced by psychotic students.

RADM (NS) Lui replied: "I think the areas that we are actually paying greater attention to right now would be dyslexia, autism, as well as, for example, other behavioural problems which I think are more common." - CNA/ir

For the article's source click below
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/277702/1/.html

Catching a cold

From Straits Times Life! Pg 6 (16th May 2007)

"The Chinese fear being called mentally ill. Actually it's like catching a cold." Actor Chow Yun Fat.


-------
Thoughts
I tried looking for the original source of the quote on the net but I just couldn't seem to find it anywhere.

The men do get it

From the health section of TODAY (22nd May 2007)
Pg 41

The men do get it.
But unlike women, men are no likely to admit they feel that way or seek help for their condition.

Joanne Yap
Joanne@mediacorp.com.sg

During his days in the army, product support coordinator Adrian Tan* caved under the pressure and stress of life in a camp and succumbed to depression.

One of his officers suggested that he consulted a psychiatrist, who prescribed anti-depressants to help Adrian cope with his condition. But due to the lack of funds, the medication dried up after his army days.

"I turned to taking off-the-counter cough syrup, as it was the only drug I knew that was cheap and sleep inducing. Over the years, the dosages I took increased, but it still didn't help my condition," Adrian said.

Contrary to the popular belief that depression mostly affects women, the reality is that men also suffer from it. In fact, 40 per cent of men aged between 40 and 60 will experience some degree of depression.

Dr Tay Woo Keng, senior consultant at the Division of Psychological Medicine at Changi General Hospital, explained:"The core symptoms of depression, such as having a depressed mood, a lack of capacity for pleasure and enjoyment, negative thinking and suicidal thoughts, are experienced by all patients regardless of sex."

The triggers of depression might be many and often include a combination of environmental, genetic and psychological factors. But while these causes are not uncommon among men and women who fall into depression, the similarity ends there.

While women tend to be more open about discussing their condition and seeking help, men often act out their feelings of hopeless and helplessness instead, through anger or working long hours.

In Adrian's case, he shield away from those around im, preferring to be on his own. "I find it difficult to communicate what I'm feelnig to others, so I don't share my thoughts very often. When I felt down I kept to myself instead."

The symptoms of depression that manifest in men are different from those typically diagnosed in women and are hence harder to recognise and diagnose.

According to Dr Tay, men tend to show depression through hostility, irritability or aggression. "Men tend to cope with their depressed feelings by drinking, taking drugs or engaging in risky acitivties like dangerous sports. They might even atttempt suicide."

As many as 80 percent of people who seek help for depression find relief through therapy or medication, but the problem remains that not many men come forward.

Dr Chua Hong Choon, senior consultant, head of general psychiatry department at the Institute of Mental Health, said :"men don't usually cry, show sadness and loss of will or verbalise an intention to hurt themselves. As a result, their depression is hidden from caring friends, family members and associates who might insist that they seek help."

According to Dr Tay, men's reticence could stem from societal and cultural expectations put on them to fit a certain mould - to be in control, tough and successful in dealing with advesities.

"Thus, men often restrain their emotions. They do not express their depression freely or ask for help, as this is perceived as a sign of weakness."

Treatments for depression include antidepressant therapy, medication or psychotherapy, which involves counselling. In addition, cognitive therapy (a form of psychotherapy) may also help in treating mild to moderate cases.

Those who are depressed tend to have a pessimistic outlook on life - and these negative thoughts become automatic and habitual over time. Therapy aims to get individuals to recognise these thoughts, challenge them and replace them with more realistic and accurate ones.

In cases of mild depression, exercise may help chase the blues away, Dr Tay advised those with depression to talk about their condition, spend time with others, keep active, write down the thoughts that trouble them and be patient with themselves as recovery is seldom achieved overnight.

For more information about male depression, call the Institute of Mental Health at 6389 2833
*Name has been changed at the request of interviewee

The site itself

I have added a couple of links and categories, anxiety disorders, grief and bereavement and a category on suicide where those who are feeling suicidal and those who wish to help those who's feeling suicidal can refer to.

I urge those who wish to help those who's suicidal to read through them now rather than wait till the need arises.

Over the next 1 to 2 weeks, I will add more categories to the link portion, including links related with Post-trauamatic stress disorder (PTSD), obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), Multiple Personality Disorder and eating disorders (anorexia and bullimia) among other things hopefully.

For those with feedback and suggestions (about the site or otherwise), pls leave me a comment or drop me an email at listeningfromtheheart83@yahoo.com

Also, I am looking for anyone who's going through or has recovered from mental illness who has a flair for the arts, someone who can draw well basically. I wish to see if any such individual is willing to volunteer and help with some ideas i have in mind for the site. Again, drop me an email if you are such a person and are interested.

Thoughts on Off Centre

This is just a personal entry so this isn't some official or unofficial review on the play.

I don't usually watch plays and I made this an exception due to the theme itself as I went to watch the play with my friend yesterday. I enjoyed the play a lot, the play lasted 1 hour 50 minutes, but I could have easily continued watching it for another 1 or 2 hours. Perhaps it's due to the fact that the theme is close to my heart, yet, without a realistic protrayal of the social situation and connection I could feel with the characters themselves, how would I have been able to enjoy it so.

While watching the show, I dare say a tinge of sadness and pain was felt because I know for myself how true and real the prejudices and the emotional and mental confilcts, and more importantly the struggles and fears that the characters face, for in the 2 characters Vinod and Saloma, I also see in them the cries and faces of some people that I know.

Vinod protrayed just how what depression supposedly is, "anger turned inward." His anger and frustrations, hidden in his fears. The seemingly stable but yet more fragile than the very girl he tried to befriend

Saloma on the other hand outwardly looks mentally and emotionally frail, yet in her, I see the courage and strength that she has deep down. Just like a friend of mine that I know who also suffers from schizophrenia coincidentally.

Emily, Saloma's friend in the play, despite how the character's manner of talking is understandably funny to most public, it brings about a sense of sadness again knowing that people like Emily truly do believe what they say and think. Delusions of grandeur.. bipolar disorder if im not mistaken.

There are several other characters I enjoyed watching in the play, among them would be Vinod's platoon seargant (not the captain mind you) who protrayed just how their fellow peers are also in a state of helplessness themselves, unable to rise against those above them in rank in the army, and not knowing how to truly help people like Vinod.

It thoroughly annoyed my friend and I that some people in the audience were constantly laughing, annoyed in the sense that I feel sad for these people in the audience who despite seeing the play, is clearly completely out of touch and unable to connect with the depth of pain and struggles the characters are going through.

I saw and recognised in the play, the loving yet denial state and lack of understanding parents some mental illness sufferers had to face, the harshness of NS which so often lacks a human heart, the fears and struggles mental illness sufferers go through, the fear and prejudice of the majority public, and the co-dependent but genuine friendship that Vinod and Saloma share. In their friendship, I saw the neediness of both, and in the progress, the abandonment and fearful feelings that Vinod must have felt.

At the end of the play, Saloma sitting there, to me protrayed the aloneness that mental illness sufferers face, and how we could all so easily take the time not to judge and be there with them and that alone could have helped and meant so much to them. We are all too busy as Saloma puts it, too busy with our lives, unable to spend a moment to care. I sat there with my friend watching the audience depart at the end of the play with Saloma sitting there waving goodbye, and I wonder, just how much did the audience truly understand what Vinod and Saloma (and all the other mental illness sufferers out there) had to go through.

Going green could beat the blues: British experts

Mon May 14, 5:26 AM ET

LONDON (AFP) - A walk in the country is an effective alternative to chemical anti-depression treatment, a leading mental health charity said Monday, calling on British doctors to prescribe outdoor activities.

The Mind charity said so-called "ecotherapy" could help millions of people with mental health problems after two studies it commissioned suggested it could have significant benefits for sufferers in most cases.

Prescription of care farms as a treatment has been highly successful on mainland Europe, but Britain has failed to follow the example, it added as it launched a report "Ecotherapy: the green agenda for mental health."

Mind chief executive Paul Farmer said: "Mind sees ecotherapy as an important part of the future for mental health.

"It's a credible, clinically-valid treatment option and needs to be prescribed by GPs, especially when for many people access to treatments other than anti-depressants is extremely limited."

Researchers from the University of Essex, eastern England, studied the effect of a 30-minute walk in a country park compared with one in an indoor shopping centre on a small sample of 20 people with mental health problems.

It found that 71 percent reported decreased levels of depression and anxiety after the outdoor walk while 90 percent said their self-esteem increased.

For the full article refer to
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20070514/hl_afp/lifestylebritainhealth;_ylt=AmLY9FEKxisQmZ_HfdzveCrVJRIF

--------------
My thoughts.
A good walk, breathing in the fresh air and sunshine always works wonders.

1 in 4 teens and young adults could face mental problems

Got this from a search. its a news article dated 2 months ago


Prime News

1 in 4 teens and young adults could face mental problems

Salma Khalik, Health Correspondent

546 words

12 March 2007

Straits Times

English

(c) 2007 Singapore Press Holdings Limited

Experts to help IMH identify symptoms early, start treatment

A MAJOR effort is under way to identify the symptoms of mental problems and start treatment early.

This comes in the face of findings which show that one in four teens and young adults here and in other developed countries could have psychological problems.

The Institute of Mental Health (IMH) has invited nine experts, both foreign and local, to help it develop a study to see how this can be done.

The hope is that this will help prevent the onset of serious diseases such as schizophrenia

One expert on the IMH panel, Associate Professor Alison Yung of Melbourne University, said: 'If we can pick them up early, we may not even need medicine to help them.'

The concern stems from studies conducted internationally - covering several developed countries, including Singapore - which have shown that 25 per cent of those in their teens and early 20s suffer from mental problems such as anxiety, depression, anorexia, psychosis and personality disorder.

For most, the problems are transient. But 10 per cent are at risk of serious long-term psychosis - or mental problems such as schizophrenia, hallucinations and delusions.

This means that going by Singapore's population growth rate, 1,000 babies born here each year could end up with serious psychological problems.

In 20 years, some of them may join the 5,300 patients warded at the IMH last year for psychosis - adding to the strain on available funds.

Already, about a third of the $40 million from Medifund, the government kitty to help the poor pay health-care bills, goes to IMH patients each year.

Grasping the extent of the problem, Associate Professor Chong Siow Ann, who heads the IMH's Early Psychosis Intervention Programme, invited the nine experts to help.

A panel member, Associate Professor Richard Keefe of Duke University in the United States, said that most serious mental illnesses hit people in their teens or early 20s - when the brain's frontal lobe is developing.

He explained: 'This is the area that helps you plan, organise, strategise - all the high-level processing. It is important in controlling behaviour and emotion - which adolescents struggle with.'

His explanation is borne out by the age range of the IMH's psychotic patients, many of whom were warded between the ages of 22 and 26.

Half of the IMH's 32,000 outpatients are also being treated for chronic schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia, one of the more serious forms of psychosis, makes patients hear voices or believe that others are reading their minds or controlling their thoughts.

Treating schizophrenia early is crucial, said Professor Patrick McGorry of the University of Melbourne. 'After a couple of years, it becomes relatively permanent, and treatment at that point is largely ineffective.'

Prof Chong hopes to get the IMH study off the ground towards the end of this year, once approval and funding is obtained.

Duke University's Prof Keefe described Singapore as an ideal place for such a study. The country is 'compact and structured', and it is easier to follow up on patients, unlike in the US, where people move around a lot.

salma@sph.com.sg

Photos from the Off Centre play

All photos belong to and are credited to "The Necessary Stage"

Mislina plays Saloma in Off Centre.

Saloma: My social worker said I must come here. Rose.  She always visit
me.

Melvinder Kanth plays Vinod and Mislina plays Saloma

Saloma [Narrator]: Saloma looked at Vinod and...and smiled.  What else
could she do?
She liked him.  He was crazy.

Mislina plays Saloma

Saloma: Must take.  If not cannot become well.  You take or not Vinod?

Mislina plays Saloma

Saloma: You can go back.  I know you very busy.  Got a lot of work to
do.  So, you can go back.

Alin Mosbit plays Mak (Saloma's mother) and Mislina plays

Saloma
Mak: Saloma, today is Friday.  Today what we do?  Asap rumah kan?  See,
I put that
there OK?  Dengar tak?  Nak dekat Azan.

Mislina plays Saloma and Melvinder Kanth plays Vinod

Vinod: We are friends?

Mr Alvin was very gracious and kind to send me these nice photos of the play itself to post up.

All photos belong to and are credited to "The Necessary Stage"

Straits Times Life! (15th May 2007) and TODAY's (14th May 2007) review of Off Centre

Life! - Life Arts

Off Centre is right on
Adeline Chia, ARTS REPORTER
432 words
15 May 2007
Straits Times
English
(c) 2007 Singapore Press Holdings Limited

OFF CENTRE The Necessary Stage Esplanade Theatre Studio Last Saturday

FIRST performed to rave reviews in 1993, Off Centre by The Necessary Stage (TNS) was lauded as a seminal play highlighting the plight of mental patients.

It has been revived by playwright Haresh Sharma this year to mark two milestones: the company's 20th anniversary, and the introduction of the play into the GCE O-level Literature syllabus.

Fourteen years on and with so many expectations riding on its back, this powerful work shows its 1990s vintage but remains fresh and compelling.

On one level, the story is a timeless one about the complex relationship between two sensitive individuals. Vinod (played by a mercurial Melvinder Kanth) is a straight-A junior college student and school debater who suffers from depression.

He meets Saloma (played sensitively and with much pathos by Mislina Mustaffa), a schizophrenic girl who graduated from a vocational institute.

And by sheer craft and sensitivity, the script is a gem which tackles serious issues with liberal doses of humour. Vinod's suggestion for a slow suicide, for instance, is to 'stay in Singapore'.

The darker elements haven't lost their ability to shock and to move either.

The way in which a clothes hanger featured in a brutal, humiliating episode during Vinod's national service and in the fate of mental patient Emily Gan (played superbly by Josephine Tan) drew gasps from the audience.

There were also aspects of the play which were quaintly dated, although not alienating. Set in a time when batik T-shirts were in fashion, and before mobile phones were ubiquitous, the two friends chat over their land lines, sing to Boyz II Men and make radio dedications to each other over Class 95.

In a way, it was apt that director Alvin Tan kept these references, as a kind of a retrospective gesture to the company's performance history.

Off Centre still strikes a raw chord 14 years after it was first staged. Some of the reasons for Vinod and Saloma's breakdowns continue to sound familiar: a high-pressure society and uncomprehending and defensive family members.

It remains one of the play's piquant ironies that its relevance partially hangs upon malaises it seeks to address. The day that mental patients are treated with respect and sympathy is
the day of Off Centre's expiry date. That day may be a long time coming, even as Vinod and Saloma become familiar characters among O-level students.

chiahta@sph.com.sg

TODAY's review

Still Off after all these years

260 words
14 May 2007
TODAY (Singapore)
English
(c) 2007. MediaCorp Press Ltd.

IT SHOCKED 14 years ago, but the re-staged play Off Centre seems a tad
mild in today's context.

You can pick out what could have been taken as shocking for local theatre in 1993. Vinod, who suffers from depression, rants about God to Saloma, his schizophrenic girlfriend. He speaks of how Singaporeans avert their attention from what they are uncomfortable with - in this case, the idea of mental patients and their ability to live, and love.

The play sparked controversy when it was first staged due to what was deemed irreverent handling of a sensitive subject matter. The Ministry of Health, which commissioned it, took away its $30,000 funding after Haresh Sharma's script didn't suit their guidelines.

But this restaging reminds us of how much has changed since the early 90s; local plays now teem with such references to the Singapore psyche, mixing critique with humour in the way that Sharma did contentiously all those years ago.

Both Sharma and director Alvin Tan have chosen not to tamper with the original play so the references remain, from the use of Boyz II Men's End Of The Road, to the denim jeans and bandannas that served as fashion for NUS undergrads then.

It would have been interesting to see the play updated for our times, but its adamant retro-ness does underscore the fact that despite the years that have passed, some things remain the same. Off Centre is on until May 20, at the Esplanade Studio Theatre.

What we can do to fight stigma and help those who are mentally ill

My below are my own thoughts and suggestions on how we can help fight stigma and to better reach out to those who are mentally ill or grieving.


1) The first and foremost is to understand and educate ourselves on what mental illness is about. What it means to those who go through mental illness.
That however as I mentioned in my previous posts isn't enough.

2) Reach out to those going through mental illness. Don't judge. Learn what it means to truly listen and empathise. Offer them the gift of your listening and understanding. Don't try to fix them or offer advice. Simply listen to them and understand.

Practice makes perfect.

"The way of being with another person which is termed empathic means temporarily living in their life, moving about in it delicately without making judgments.... To be with another in this way means that for the time being you lay aside the views and values you hold for yourself in order to enter the other's world without prejudice...a complex, demanding, strong, yet subtle and gentle way of being."
Carl Rogers

3) Learn what it means to truly listen. Practise how to listen.

Reassuring someone isn't the same as listening.

4) With every opportunity possible, do what we can to help speak out against the stigma against mental illness sufferers. Many mental illness sufferers are afraid to voice out their condition, you'll be surprised who may admit to you they are going through such a condition or know of someone close to them who does if you speak out and show acceptance for them.

5) Naturally, don't join in the bandwagon on calling mental illness sufferers as "siao", "psycho" or "crazy." It's rude, discriminating, insensitive and downright unkind.

Don't call those people who self-harm as attention seeking. Most people don't realise that self-mutilation for instance may be the person's way of coping, however dysfunctional others may see it.

And don't call those people who are considering, or attempted or commited suicide as "cowards."
Don't judge.

The kindest word in all the world is the unkind word, unsaid. ~Author Unknown

6) Have faith in them. Believe in them. Help them and help yourself understand that it is going to take time for them to recover, but they will (recover). Whatever they're going through, "It will pass in time." The important thing is, you must believe it yourself in your belief in them

"Treat a man as he appears to be and you make him worse. But treat a man as if he already were and what he potentially could be, and you make him what he should be." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

7) When they are slow in their recovery or in their signs of progress, or those who are grieving be patient with them. Don't rush them. Don't try to set datelines in saying/thinking that they have grieve/depressed enough. Let them move at their own pace.

Any frustration at their lack of progress stems from our own impatience. Work on our impatience instead and learn to be patient. Be patient with ourselves and be patient with them. Encourage them, don't give up on them.

"Patience makes lighter what sorrow may not heal." - Horace

8) There is a stigma against the male gender on that men shouldn't cry. If people are in pain and they wish to cry, let them, don't deny them that, male or female. The ability to cry is part of what makes us human

"But there was no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bore witness that a man had the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer." - Victor E. Franklin

9) Don't say things like "they shouldn't feel this way."
Acknowledge their feelings. Do not invalidate their feelings.

Feelings are facts to the person experiencing them.

10) Don't give up. We are human beings, flawed in our own ways. We may make mistakes everyday in our effort to combat stigma or in reaching out to others. What matters is that we continue to learn from the mistakes we make.

Understanding and the art of listening can be learnt and acquired.

With every mistake, humility can be acquired. And with humility, the better understanding and empathy we can extend to others.

Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle - Plato

Off Centre Post Event Talk – About Schizophrenia

This event and news is taken from SilverRibbonSingapore's website at
http://www.silverribbonsingapore.com/news.htm


Off Centre Post Event Talk – About Schizophrenia
22 May 2007
Institute of Mental Health
Lecture Hall
Free Admission
*First-come-first serve basis.
To register at info@silverribbonsingapore.com

Join the following speakers to understand more about Schizophrenia!

Dr Lim Choon Guan
Psychiatrist, Institute of Mental Health

Mr Alvin Tan
Founder/Artistic Director, The Necessary Stage

Mr Haresh Sharma
Resident Playwright, The Necessary Stage

Mr Harris Ng
President, Association for The Open Mind

Dr Rita Goh
Founder, Aspiron Services

Problems mental illness sufferers face

Brief thoughts.


Stigma being the most obvious and main problem that mental illness sufferers face, there is a list of other issues and obstacles that they have to overcome, which includes but not limited to,

a) Fear of ending up in hospital or IMH. The Institute of Mental Health (IMH) or formerly known as Woodbridge Hospital, carries with it its own stigma.

b) Medication and treatment. Its' costs and the amount of medication they have to take.

c) Suicide. Voicing out their suicidal thoughts.

d) Denial from family, love ones and friends

My own brief thoughts and opinions based on the observations I notice of the above points.

a) I feel that most mental illness sufferers are finding it difficult to accept that they are mentally ill. It is even harder when one realises they may at some point end up in IMH if they are not coping for IMH carries a stigma of being a hospital for the "insane". Naturally that's not necessarily true, yet the perception is there. The fear of hospitals/IMH is very real.

b) Medication for the mentally ill do not come cheap. And unlike a flu or a cough, the medication has to be taken for a minimum of a couple of weeks and for some, it may last a life time. A mental illness is a serious illness that takes a toll on the financial status of the individual. It takes a very severe toll on the financial status of those who's trying to pay off their treatment bills alone. This sometimes results in working adults who's suffering from mental illnesses fearing of losing their job as they would not be able to support their family or pay off their treatment and medication bills, and find themselves having this added to their stress and unable to cope well when they need a break.

For those who are seeking a job, the mental illness stigma prevents them from finding a job easily and often, this also may mean that they have an extra personal reason not to continue with medication thus hindering their recovery.

Another point to note, taking the medication itself is already awful as it is. Imagine having to take several pills everyday for an unknown period of time. It is nothing short of distressing for some of them.

c) The suicide stigma adds further havoc to the lives of those mentally ill. Mental illnesses may result in suicidal thoughts and when those who are on the brink of ending their life is crying out internally for help, they often find themselves facing judgemental words from others, thus finding their pleas for help ignored, judged or invalidated.

There are often very few people who can remain calm and level-headed and yet treat it seriously when listening to the suicidical thoughts and words of those who's feeling helpless and hopeless. This means that those mental illness sufferers who have suicidal thoughts have precious few people if any at all to turn to.

Also, the fact that their doctors (be they psychologists or counselors) are required to breach the term of confidentality if there's a serious danger of the client posing a threat to themselves, mental illness sufferers, especially the younger ones, find themselves afraid of the possibility of their parents finding out.

Nobody wishes to see a suicide note of someone we care and love and knowing that the person has departed from our lives. Yet, it is a sad fact that that's what happened to too many people.

More can be done and should be done to understand how we can help them.

d) Due to a lack of understanding, some mental illness sufferers find themselves in a situation where their parents or love ones do not acknowledge the fact that they are going through a problem. They believe that the mental illness sufferer is actually fine and that there's nothing wrong with them. This effectively in my view shuts down an avenue of support for the mental illness sufferer and creates another front where the individual has to cope with.

At the end of the day, too few have champion the cause, and even fewer still have stood up who have recovered from it themselves

It is very limiting to maintain the status quo. For years countries all over have tried to fight stigma by educating the public through various ways. Yet progress has been painfully slow. I see plenty of workshops educating the public on mental education, I see no workshops dedicated to working on fighting stigma.

My opinion is that the status quo simply maintains the position of "we have the help you need, come to us and we'll see to it that you get treated." That is not a proactive stance.

Simply knowing a brief understanding of what mental illness constitutes is not sufficient to fight stigma.

What can we do more to help?

Nearly 7 in 10 kids exposed to trauma by age 16

Nearly 7 in 10 kids exposed to trauma by age 16

By Anne Harding Wed May 9, 3:23 PM ET

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - While exposure to traumatic events among children and teens is "almost commonplace," only a small fraction of young people will go on to develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after such exposure, a new study shows

But the findings shouldn't be interpreted to mean that kids don't suffer after a trauma, Dr. William E. Copeland of Duke University Medical Center in Durham, North Carolina, the study's lead author, told Reuters Health. While children exposed to a single traumatic event did seem to fare well, those exposed to two or more such events were at higher risk of developing post-traumatic stress symptoms, as well as psychiatric disorders such as depression and anxiety.

For the full article, refer to the below link
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070509/hl_nm/kids_trauma_dc;_ylt=At.3_d481IYCZ5zBN39LN9fVJRIF

Eating disorder? Genes to blame too

An article in the newspapers about anorexia and bullimia dated 28th March 2007 (1 month plus ago)

Eating disorder? Genes to blame too

By Judith Tan - Mar 28, 2007
The Straits Times

The common perception of anorexia and bulimia sufferers is that they have brought the problem upon themselves by trying to get a fashionably slender figure.

But the causes of eating disorders among young girls and women are far more complex.

Researchers have found that genes seem to play an important role in determining who is vulnerable. It is much like the link between smoking and lung cancer, said Dr Blake Woodside, a psychiatrist at the University of Toronto.

'Not all smokers develop lung cancer. There is a genetic risk factor for smoking-linked cancer. Similarly, not all women exposed to the ideal of being fashionably thin develop eating disorders,' he said.

True, society's obsession with attaining what it perceives to be an ideal body is a contributing factor, which is why 'we get overly concerned with our weight and diet'.

'Yet less than 0.5 per cent of all women develop anorexia nervosa. This points to the fact that that societal pressure is not the lone cause,' he said.

To read the full article, refer to the below link

Eating disorder? Genes to blame too

Fighting and understanding the woodbridge stigma

A well written article in the below link about the nature of the Woodbridge Hospital (now known as the Institute of Mental Health) stigma by a local undergrad.

http://www.singaporeangle.com/2007/02/fighting_and_understanding_the.html

There is a stigma to IMH/woodbridge even among those who's mentally ill. Mention to some of them that they have to get hospitalised there, and you can just see how terrified they can get.

Make a difference

Here's a beautiful clip that a good friend of mine forwarded through email.

I hope that everyone takes the time to watch the clip, it will be worth your while

http://www.teachermovie.com

and a quote here from Mother Teresa to go along with it for us to think abt.

We can do no great things, only small things with great love. ~Mother Teresa

Best/Worst things to say to someone who is depressed

A list of the best/worst things to say to someone who is depressed.
http://www.thewellspring.com/Journal/JWT/worstbestdepressed.html

I would say that the list applies to all those who has to go through mental illnesses, grief or just feeling plain down.

Push for mental-health 'parity' continues

United Press International®
News. Analysis. Insight.™
Health Business - Briefing
Published: May 2, 2007 at 7:48 PM

Push for mental-health 'parity' continues

WASHINGTON, May 2 (UPI) -- Mental-health parity advocates set up
camp at the U.S. Capitol Wednesday to demand equal insurance coverage for
mental illness.

After an outdoor news conference with Reps. Patrick Kennedy, D-R.I.,
and Jim Ramstad, R-Minn., sponsors of a bill that would require health
insurers to cover mental illness in the same way as physical illness,
advocates set up a headquarters in a Senate office building from which
they organized lobbying visits and phone calls.

The Paul Wellstone Mental Health and Addiction Equity Act would
prohibit insurers from imposing higher co-payments and deductibles on
beneficiaries for mental healthcare.

The bill is named after the late Sen. Paul Wellstone of Minnesota who
was the bill's original sponsor.

"This is a public health crisis that in some way impacts every family
in America. It's time to break down the barriers to good mental health
and addiction treatment," Kennedy said.

Study guide for local play (Off Centre)

Mr Alvin is kind enough to forward this article to me.

Life! Arts
The Straits Times
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Pg 12

Study guide for local play

A former lead actor in the play Off Centre, which is a GCE O-level
literature text, has written a guidebook to it

Adeline Chia
ARTS REPORTER

YOU could say Abdulattif Abdullah is the perfect man for the job.

The 39-year old English and literature head in Bukit Batok Secondary
School, who played lead character Vinod in Off Centre when it was first
staged in 1993, has written a student’s guidebook to the play.

He had married a fellow cast member, Sakinah Dollah, who played the
female lead, the following year. The study guide was written because
the work by playwright Haresh Sharma of The Necessary Stage (TNS) has
been selected as a GCE O-level literature text this year.

The seminal work about mental illness is the first Singaporean play to
become an O-level text. Not all schools have to study it as they can
use another play on the syllabus, but 13 schools are doing so this
year.

The play is about the friendship between Vinod, a top debater in school
who has a mental breakdown, and a 19-year old, schizophrenic called
Saloma. It is best remembered for bringing the plight of mental
patients to the public’s attention.

For the past six months, Abdulattif and colleague Ruth Tan, 28, have
been writing a 40-page guidebook, which includes sections on
characterization, plot, themes and sample essays.

“It has a lot more details than your typical Cliff Notes
guidebook,” he
says. They are still looking for a publisher but hope to have the book
ready by July in time for the school exams in September.

He says his involvement in the play more than a decade ago gave him
unique insights.

Together with Sharma and TNS artistic director Alvin Tan, he spent
months researching and interviewing mental patients and working out the
roles in workshops.

Also, having played Vinod gave him a deeper understanding of the
character’s motivations which he hopes to share with students.

“If anything else, I can talk to my wife about it,” he says with a
laugh. He has three children with Sakina, 34, who now runs a
pre-school.

Off Centre joins two other Singaporean texts in the O-level curriculum.
They are Heartland, a novel written in 1999 by lawyer Darren Shiau,
and Island Voices, a 2007 anthology of Singapore short stories
commissioned by the Education Ministry.

The ministry said the play was included because it satisfied the
criteria for literature texts, which include To Kill A Mockingbird by
Harper Lee and A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

“Off Centre explores a wider range of themes such as marginalisation,
friendship, and societal and familial pressures. The play has good
characterisation, dramatic potential and accessibility,” said a
ministry spokesman.

The play has been restaged thrice since its debut in 1993. The most
recent revival was in Malay, called Otak Tak Centre in Kuala Lumpur two
years ago.

Over the past 14 years, Off Centre has also been made into an
experimental feature film and adapted into a television movie, both
with the same title. It has also been given a full reading in Britain
and taught at the International Islamic University Malaysia in Kuala
Lumpur.

Sharma, 41, has been giving talks to teachers since it was announced
the play would become a school text, and even had a webchat with
students on it.

“I feel like a mini-literary celebrity,” he jokes.

And for an entire generation of students who had missed the first run,
TNS is restaging the play this month.

Alvin Tan, 44, who directs the play, says Off Centre remains relevant
today because prejudice against mental health patients still exists.

“I still hear of people whose salaries get halved because employers
think that if you have mental health issues, you’re not so
productive,” he says.

He adds that Off Centre is also a timeless play about human
relationships, such as the friendship between the lead characters Vinod
and Saloma.

Playing Vinod this time is Melvinder Kanth, 34, an actor and
documentary film-maker. Saloma is played by Mislina Mustaffa, 36.

And reprising her 1993 role as Saloma’s mother is actress Alin
Mosbit, 33.

Alin says she is now closer to the actual age of her character, who is
in her late 40s. In the first Off Centre production, she was only 19.

She adds: “The character is more curt and much harsher – she has a
darker streak this time.”

chiahta@sph.com.sg

Off Centre will be staged at the Esplanade Theatre Studio from May 9
to 20 with 3pm shows on May 9, 12 and 13, and from May 16 to 20; 8pm
shows on May 9 to 12, May 18 and 19.

Tickets at $30 from Sistic (www.sistic.com.sg, tel: 6348-5555).

Mentally Ill Kids Face Widespread Stigma

This news report came from the US.

By Randy Dotinga
HealthDay Reporter Mon Apr 30, 7:01 PM ET

MONDAY, April 30 (HealthDay News) -- Children with mental illness may face a double burden -- the condition itself, and discrimination and stigma at school and elsewhere, a new survey shows.


Almost half of U.S. adults polled expected that children undergoing mental health treatment would be rejected at school, and half anticipate that these youngsters will also suffer problems later in life.

At the same time, almost nine out of 10 Americans believe that doctors overmedicate kids with behavior problems.

"It's pretty clear that there's a lot of prejudice and discrimination about children's mental health problems in American culture," said lead researcher Bernice Pescosolido, professor of sociology at Indiana University. "These attitudes and beliefs are very powerful in terms of what happens to kids and their families."

Pescosolido said she and colleagues began examining attitudes about mental illness after reading news reports that stigma had begun to disappear. These came alongside what she called an "extraordinary tidal wave of [media] response" that was largely critical of changes in the treatment of mentally ill children.

Drugs are being prescribed more often to kids, and psychiatrists are diagnosing illnesses at much younger ages, Pescosolido said. Indeed, there are reports of kids being diagnosed when they are little more than babies.

For this study, her team examined the results of a 2002 survey of almost 1,400 adults; the margin of error was plus or minus four percentage points. The findings are published in the May 2007 issue of the journal Psychiatric Services.

Forty-five percent of those surveyed believed that kids who were undergoing mental health treatment would be rejected by their classmates at school, and 43 percent said that stigma around mental health issues would create problems for them in adulthood.

"No matter what that person attains later in life, this will follow them around," Pescosolido said. "This is classic stigma, when someone is marked and seen as less than (others)."

But stigma also could prevent people from getting the treatment they need, Pescosolido said.

Meanwhile, most of those polled were "very negative about the use of any kind of psychoactive medication for children's mental problems," she said. In fact, 85 percent of people surveyed said kids are already overmedicated for common behavioral problems, and over half (52 percent) felt that psychiatric medication "turns kids into zombies."

Could they be right about kids taking too many medications? "I'm sure there are some [cases], but how much do anecdotal stories really match the reality? I don't think the science is there" to provide answers, Pescosolido said.

She added that there are big differences in how people view the use of drugs to treat physical illness and mental illness. "If your child had diabetes, and you needed insulin, would you wring your hands over that?" the researcher said.

Dr. Andrew Adesman, chief of developmental and behavioral pediatrics at Schneider Children's Hospital in New York City, said he encounters bias against the use of psychiatric drugs every day.

"There's a disconnect," he said. "The public is generally looking to embrace evidence-based treatments (for other conditions) yet rejecting pharmaceutical interventions when data suggest it works."

What to do? Pescosolido called for a better mental health care system and more discussion about prejudice and discrimination that targets mentally ill kids.

Taken from
http://news.yahoo.com/s/hsn/20070430/hl_hsn/mentallyillkidsfacewidespreadstigma;_ylt=AvO5ewSo7iupjffLVBMh3WrVJRIF

Listening

This is posted in my first entry of this blog which I will refer to again

"When we honestly ask ourselves
Which person in our lives means the most to us,
we often find that it is those who,
instead of giving too much advice, solutions or cures,
have chosen rather to share our pain
and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand.
The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion,
who can stay with us in an hour of grief or bereavement,
who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing,
and face us with the reality of our powerlessness,
that is a friend who cares.
- Henri J. M. Nouwen "Out of Solitude;Three Meditations on the Christian Life"

My thoughts.

I'm sure most if not all of us desire to be understood by others. And we have at one point or other in our lives needed that listening ear to listen to us, perhaps we had a bad day at work or in school, perhaps we just had our hearts broken or rejected by others, perhaps we are grieving over a loss, or perhaps, we are struggling to carry on in life, trying to find that courage to carry on and just simply needed an outlet for someone to listen to our struggles.

Often, many people tries to console others not realising that their perceived good intentions have a very adverse effect on those whom we try to comfort.

We are often quick to attempt to solve other people's problems, giving them advice, solutions, believing that answers, solutions is what others are asking of us when they approach us.

Lines like "What should I do?" "Why did this happen to me?" tug at our heartstrings making us think that if we can give them an answer to their questions we will solve their problems. But it is not always answers they seek when they say that, often, what they need is to know that we are there with them and to acknowledge that it's a terrible time and period that they are going through.

A crying "why?" from someone in pain is not always an invitation to start giving them what we think is the truth or the answer in the world. The truth hurts but it is the truth, or so some people might claim. The "truth" however, when inappropriately said is most unkind and cruel to say the least to the individual whos in pain. It is a lack of understanding and sensitivity to the feelings of the person we address. It is shoving our opinions and perspectives down their throat without a care or thought of how they feel. It is thoughtlessness at its worst.

One might wonder, is that "why?" not a question to be answered? To a grieving widow, a broken-hearted teenager, a person who has lost everything, the answer to the why (why did this happen, why did it happen to me, why did he/she leave...) often simply doesn't matter. It cease to matter because at that point in time, it is their pain that matter to them, for it is their pain that overwhelms them so completely. They are in such terrible pain emotionally and mentally that any answer, no matter how good an answer we might think it is, is of small and cold comfort.

We are not here to take away their confusion, their pain. We are here to be a friend, to let them know we know they're hurting and in pain and we want to be with them, to let them know that they're not completely alone. We are with them, stay with them when they are down, not in front of them so impatiently trying to drag them back up for whatever intentions we think we have.

Many are uncomfortable with people wallowing in self-pity, we want them to snap out of it, pull themselves together, we tell them there's so many other more unfortunate people than them, we want to tell them that they aren't the only ones with problems. We mean well, what we are trying to tell them is that things aren't actually as bad as they perceive but we fail to see just how hurtful and cruel such comments are to them, we fail in making them feel heard or understood and invalidate how they feel in the process. We are too busy in telling them what we think and feel using the almighty good intentions as a reason to justify what we say, rather than truly sit with them and feel and try to understand what they feel.

We are uncomfortable at times with some of the questions they ask. Who are "they"? "They" can be our spouse, our friends, our family, the mentally ill, the people who are grieving, the people who are down, broken-hearted, the list goes on, the common factor is that they want a listening ear, they want to feel heard, to feel understood. We seem to expect ourselves to must have the answers to their questions but it's okay not to have the answers. It is okay to be powerless. To understand that is to go one step in understanding the feelings of hopelessness and helplessness that those who are in depression and in grief feels.

When we tell them that they shouldn't feel that way, they shouldn't feel sad because..., they shouldn't feel angry because.... etc, we are invalidating how they feel. Why should they not have a right to feel what they feel? Why should we deny them what it means to be human?

Would we ever truly understand how they truly feel? Personally I don't think so. We can come close by putting ourselves in their shoes but we're not them. And it is this fact that we have to realise that we are not the ones going through their pain. And that pain is very real and very painful to them.

When they are silent, can we sit with them and stay quiet too? Many of us aren't comfortable with silence. We feel an urge to fill the silence. It is however not words that they want to hear from us, silence is a gift at times. It is a gift of listening, a gift of letting them dwell and explore what they feel.

At the end of the day, the question we have to ask ourselves for those who truly wish to give a listening ear or to be a friend to those in need, have we truly make them feel heard and understood? Have we given them the gift of kindness and understanding, accepting them for who they are. Have we given them the gift of listening?

Mediacorp's Radio Interview with Off Centre's director Alvin Tan

An interview done by Mediacorp Radio with Off centre's (refer to the last blog entry for more information) director Alvin Tan about their journey and research that went into this play.

Read the interview here
http://www.rsi.sg/english/artsarena/view/20070426170427/1/.html


My thoughts.

I had the opportunity and privilege to hear and speak to Mr Alvin personally a couple of days ago spoke about his own experiences and story regarding his brother and his family. I won't go into details but it was heartwarming to hear from him his brother's route to recovery and will to live, as well as the support and patience his brother has received from their parents. I could see that it couldn't have been easy all these while for their family and I truly wish them well and hope that the play would help spread more awareness of mental illness.

Thank you Mr Alvin for sharing with me.

Off Centre

Off Centre



First staged in 1993 to critical acclaim, Off Centre is recognised as a
landmark play in the history of Singapore theatre, best remembered for
bringing mental illness and its patients’ plight to the attention of
the media and general public in Singapore. The play traces the
friendship of Saloma and Vinod and the hurdles they have to overcome,
including social stigmas, prejudices and personal conflicts.


Off Centre has also been selected by the Ministry of Education as the
first Singapore play to be offered as a GCE ‘O’ Level literature text
from 2007, and has been republished by The Necessary Stage.


9, 12 – 13, 16 – 20 May 2007, 3pm
9 – 12 May, 18 – 19 May 2007, 8pm

$30 | $21* (Excludes $2 SISTIC ticketing fee)
* Concessions for students, NSF & senior citizens

Get your tickets from 1 Mar 2007 at all SISTIC authorised agents,
online at www.sistic.com or via the SISTIC hotline at 6348 5555.

For more information or for school and corporate bookings, please
contact us at Tel: 6440 8115 or email: admin@necessary.org

Medisave liberalised further from May 1

Medisave liberalised further from May 1
By Hasnita A Majid, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 29 April 2007 1926 hrs

SINGAPORE: From Tuesday, CPF members who are hospitalised or who go for day surgery can use more of their Medisave to pay for their bills.

The Health Ministry announced two months ago it would be raising the Medisave withdrawal limit to benefit more patients.

From May 1, the withdrawal cap for inpatient stay at hospitals will go up by $50 to $450 per day.

The change is expected to benefit about 112,000 bills.

With the increase in withdrawal limit, Medisave will on average cover 82% of each B1-class bill, up from 76% currently, and 66% of each A-class or private hospital ward bill, compared to 57% respectively.

With the existing withdrawal limit, more than 90% of all Class B2/C bills are already fully covered without the need for any cash outlay.

The Health Ministry says the change is to help middle-income earners reduce the cash outlay when they are hospitalised.

For patients undergoing day surgery, the Medisave withdrawal limit is raised to $300 from the current $200.

With the revision, 84 percent of all subsidised day surgery bills will be fully covered by Medisave, compared to 77 percent now.

This translates to greater coverage for about another 30,000 day surgery episodes.

The Ministry hopes this will encourage more patients to opt for day surgery if they do not need to be hospitalised.

This will not only save them money and time but also free up valuable bed space for other patients.

For those needing inpatient psychiatric treatment, the annual Medisave withdrawal limit will be increased from $3,500 to $5,000.

This change, also effective from May 1, will ensure greater coverage of hospital bills of up to 82 percent of a Class B2/C bill, compared to about 68 percent currently.

About 1,200 patients who stay long term, especially in Institute of Mental Health (IMH) wards, will stand to benefit from the change. - CNA/ir

For the article, refer to below
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/273247/1/.html

=============================
My thoughts :

This news would come as an added help. The change means an additional $125 per month allowed to be withdrawn from medisave for those needing psychiatric treatment.

Stigma worsens mental illness

A newspaper (MindYourBody) article from a few months (Jan 2007) back. My own views are placed below of the article.

========================================================
Stigma worsens mental illness

By Shefali Srinivas -
The Straits Times

A steady, simple job and acceptance from people are top of the wishlist for patients recovering from mental illnesses. But these very things are in short supply and have significant impact on whether the road to recovery is rocky or smooth.

Even though mental illness can strike any one at any age - people with these conditions face fear, hostility and disapproval rather than compassion, support and understanding.

This stigma and the role it plays in mental illness was the subject of a recently concluded study at Institute of Mental Health (IMH) in Singapore.

Nurse educator Poh Chee Lien, who was involved in the study, said the aim was to find out the extent to which patients encountered stigma and if they had any strategies to deal with it.

While the study results are yet to be published, it was conducted by nurses who looked specifically at schizophrenia and the stigma that recovering schizophrenics face.

For the full article, refer to the link below
Stigma worsens mental illness

======================================================

In one of the last few lines of the article, Prof Chong said "'You can gauge how civilised a society is by the way they treat their mentally ill." I would say, we can gauge how gracious and how kind/unkind a society is by the way they treat the mentally ill.

Those who go through mental illnesses are treated as outcasts. Yet I find myself seeing that their discrimination comes from their fears of what they do not understand. For a society like Singapore, it can be rather difficult to accept that we actually are still so ignorant, filled with so much misperceptions and intolerance. Yet as mentioned, in all honest truth, can we blame them? I don't think we can or should. For it is all too human for us to fear the unknown. What then can be done to fight the stigma? What can we do more to spread understanding and awareness.

How much are we all as part of society doing our part in listening?

I hope to see the day where mental illness sufferers here can be treated with more kindness, understanding and acceptance.

Depression May Be Early Sign of Parkinson's Disease

By Jeffrey Perkel
HealthDay Reporter Fri Apr 27, 11:47 PM ET

FRIDAY, April 27 (HealthDay News) -- In some cases, depression can be an early manifestation of Parkinson's disease, new research suggests.

Researchers at the Harvard School of Public Health compared antidepressant use among more than 1,000 individuals with Parkinson's disease to more than 6,600 age- and gender-matched individuals without the degenerative neurological illness.

They found that people currently on antidepressants had an 80 percent higher risk of developing Parkinson's disease than those who had never taken antidepressants. This was true for both men and women, regardless of age or the class of antidepressant used.

For the full article refer to the below link
Depression may be early sign of Parkinson's disease

Six-fold increase in eating disorders among teenagers since 2002

Six-fold increase in eating disorders among teenagers since 2002
By Janice Ng and Julia Ng, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 20 February 2007 2019 hrs


Photos 1 of 2
SINGAPORE: The number of teenagers with eating disorder has increased six-fold since 2002.

The Singapore General Hospital said 140 new cases are reported every year.

But only 10 to 20 percent of them are seeking treatment.

A study of some 1,000 girls across Asia, aged between 15 and 17, shows teenage girls suffer from a severe lack of confidence.

In Singapore, more than eight in ten want to change the way they look, while six in ten feel bad about themselves because of looks or weight.

Read more here
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/259641/1/.html

Mad Medusa Mum

Mad Medusa mum

By Judith Tan - Apr 4, 2007
The Straits Times

Looking at my three-year-old, people say I'm a great mother and that my daughter, Victoria, is clever and well-adjusted.

But they would be surprised if they knew this: In the first few months of her life, I entertained graphic thoughts of picking her up, opening the window of my flat and throwing her out of it.

I was going through post-partum depression.

I can laugh now, but at that time it was no laughing matter. I didn't realise what was happening. I just felt overwhelmed by this little person who didn't like to sleep.

I guess I had really set myself up for deep disappointment.

I got pregnant when I was 26 and I wanted to go the natural way. I looked for a gynaecologist who believed in it, and I even went on radio to tell listeners that I wouldn't have an epidural.

When my friend, a mother of three, heard the show, she called to say I was mad to have such high expectations of myself.

She was right. It turned out to be a difficult birth and I ended up going through an emergency C-section.

I also thought that, after the birth, the nurse would clean the baby, put her in my arms and my husband would take a snapshot which would be picture perfect - like we see on TV.

It was nothing like that.

When I looked at the photo, I was dishevelled and my face like kena bus langah (like a bus had hit me).

When I went home with Victoria, I had to cope with my C-section wound, a crying and non-sleeping baby, and bleeding nipples.

All these little things added up - making me feel like a loser. It was no wonder I went into depression.

Read the full article below
http://justwoman.asiaone.com.sg/motherhood/stories/20070404_001.html

The gift of listening

Friend

"When we honestly ask ourselves
Which person in our lives means the most to us,
we often find that it is those who,
instead of giving too much advice, solutions or cures,
have chosen rather to share our pain
and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand.
The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion,
who can stay with us in an hour of grief or bereavement,
who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing,
and face us with the reality of our powerlessness,
that is a friend who cares.
- Henri J. M. Nouwen "Out of Solitude;Three Meditations on the Christian Life"

Listen

When I ask you to listen to me,
and you start giving advice,
you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me,
and you begin to tell me why I shouln't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me,
and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems,
you have failed me, strange as that may seem.

Listen! All I asked was that you listen.
Not talk or do -- just hear me.

Advice is cheap;
a quarter will get you both Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the same newspaper.

And I can do for myself;
I'm not helpless.
Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and weakness.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I quit trying to convince you and get about the business of understanding what's behind this irrational feeling. And when that's clear, the answers are obvious and I don't need advice.

Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them.

Perhaps that's why prayer works sometimes for some people -- because God is mute, and He doesn't give advice or try to fix things. He may just listen and let you work it out for yourself.

So, please listen and just hear me -- and, if you want to talk,
wait a minute for your turn; and I will listen to you.

Anonymous